photo: Marthijn Uittenbogaard
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Some day coming out of the closet will be history

© 8 November 2017 Marthijn Uittenbogaard

Gay people have to come out of the closet at some point in their lives. If they choose to stay in the closet, they have a secret which will last a lifetime. Coming out of the closet is not a one time event. You have do do this over and over. Except, if you are a famous person like Elton John for instance. If someone famous comes out of the closet, then the whole world knows. He or she has not to repeat this with every new friend or colleague they meet. It’s not easy to come out of the closet. I just read in an article [1] that one in six people in the UK believe that homosexuality should be a crime!

Quote: "In the UK, where homosexuality has been decriminalised for 50 years, one in six people (17%) agreed that "people who engage in romantic or sexual relationships with people of the same sex should be charged as criminals". In Australia the figure stood at 16%, while 18% of US respondents agreed with the statement."

And some people give a dishonest answer just to be part of the largest group. In reality the number of people against homosexuality may be even higher. Think about it. You live with your same-sex partner somewhere in a house and you go out to do some shopping. One in six people you see believe that your sex life should be criminal. They usually don't tell you that, but they think it when they see you. So when people say that nowadays homosexuality is accepted, you know it's only just starting to become acceptable.

Real acceptance is finally there, when no one has to come out of the closet anymore. When a woman tells that she is attracted to Arnold Schwarzenegger type of guys, we will not see this as a coming out. If you are secretly in love with this woman and you are very skinny you can run to the gym and work on your body. Otherwise you have not a chance with her, you may think. When you are gay and secretly in love with a boy, you hope he too will be gay (or bisexual). In that case your love may be answered with his love. But there are so many things in every person which makes him or her attracted to person A and not attracted to person B. Gender is just one of them. So ‘coming out’ in the future as gay only says something about one of all aspects of attraction: gender only.

And because more and more people find out about themselves that they are not 100% straight or 100% gay, this aspect is less and less important. Coming out in the way we know it will be history. Coming out will be telling people your preferences. And maybe your preferences will change when you see HIM or HER and fall in LOVE immediately. There are more possibilities if you are open minded. And you will not find the need to suppress others if you accept yourself.

[1] Article < One in four people say those in same-sex relationships 'should be charged as criminals' > by Pamela Duncan;; The Guardian; 31 October 2017

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