photo: Marthijn Uittenbogaard
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Changing households

© 15 October 2019 Marthijn Uittenbogaard

A father, a mother and one or more children. That used to be the standard household in our society. Or grandpa and grandma. Someone living alone - except widows or widowers - was unusual. Two friends (or more) that are sexual not in a relationship living together, was also not very common. But today, more and more households consist of friends living together. Sometimes a group of friends. But many laws still are in place that are based on the old situation. A situation that is not so common as it used to be. Inheritance laws are in favor of family members. A friend receives much less when he or she is in someone's will. A higher percentage goes to the state in these cases.

It should not matter if people living together, have sex with each other or not, concerning our laws. When it does not matter at all, people are more free to choose how and with whom to live. Our laws are outdated. Laws forcing people in a standard relationship should have never existed in the first place.

Some children have three or four parents. Well, they live with one or two parents but sometimes their parents are divorced and in a new relationship. Sometimes two gay males have a child that is born out off a surrogacy mother. And sometimes she wants to keep contact with the child. In such cases, old fahsioned laws are also a stand in the way. In The Netherlands, politicians have proposed to change some of these laws in favor of situations with 'more than two parents.'

The state should let its citizens as free as possible. People should choose who to live with. I even believe children should be free to choose where and with whom to live with.

Many young people - people in their twenties - still live at their parents' place. Far longer than they want to. But to get a house, you must be years on a list to be qualified. Except if you are rich and you buy a house. This sort of forced living with your parents, also declines freedom. This way, the family and the state has too much power over young people.

Our sexual norms are a way of regulating, and forcing, people into 'acceptable' relationships. These norms also suppresses us and it costs us a lot of freedom. The first step to get rid of these suppressions is by thinking without any taboos about society's sexual norms. Free yourself, and others.

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"Wees eerlijk en laat zien wie je bent."
"Kinderen moeten veel meer zeggenschap krijgen."
"Alle zedenwetten moeten weg."
"Pedohaat heeft niets met seks te maken."
"We gaan verkeerd met seksualiteit om."
"Hoe zinniger wat je zegt, hoe bozer men wordt."
"Zonder pedofilie zou de wereld veel armer zijn."